Bananas and Kiwis
by Princess of the Underground
Summary: What happens when Sasame catches Hayate buying something no one else but Himeno should know about? FUNNY! Warning: Adult Themes


Ok, this is just a funny little plot I thought up last night while getting ready for bed. Wouldn't it be funny if Sasame caught Hayate buying something no one else but Himeno should know about? Yes, yes it would!

Warnings: Does have slight sexual content, including a small sex scene. Rated M for a reason! I don't want anyone complaining about it containing sex! You have been warned!

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Hayate scanned the shelves with his piercing blue eyes, burrowing his brows in frustration. What was it that she liked! Strawberry? No, that wasn't it. Cherry? No, reminded her of cough syrup. He scratched his head and continued to look for something that would make him remember what she had sent him for.

"Hello, Hayate, surprise seeing you here," A voice said, causing Hayate to jump back two feet from the shelf.

"Oh, Sasame! I'm just here buying, umm… q-tips!" Hayate said, his face turning very red as he quickly turned his back on his fellow knight and pretended to scan the shelf behind him.

"Q-tips, huh? In the _birth control _aisle?" The knight of sound said, slight amusement hidden in his voice.

"What?" Hayate asked, looking around. "Birth control? What am I doing here? I tell you, they should hire people who actually know the store! No wonder I couldn't find the q-tips!" He let out a nervous laugh and quickly walked down the aisle, Sasame following behind him.

"Q-tips are at the other end of the store," the knight said over his friends shoulder, still following a few feet behind.

"Yes, thank you," Hayate said, a hint of scorn in his voice.

"If you don't mind, I'll check out with you," Sasame said, holding up a bag of popcorn. "It's movie night, so Takako sent me for snack foods!"

Hayate really did not want Sasame to stay, but he could not make up the right excuse, so he simply nodded his head. Grabbing the first box of q-tips he saw, he quickly headed to the checkout line, and stood hoping Sasame could not see the tint of red that was still on his cheeks.

Of course he had meant to be in the birth control aisle. Q-tips, what a lame excuse. It should surprise everyone if he and Himeno _weren't _having sex. They had been dating over a year, she was almost eighteen by now.

He was very surprised, actually, that Sasame seemed not to know. Himeno was very… vocal… in expressing her love for him during the act. He had tried to shush her several times, reminding her that Sasame's room was right down the hall from his, but he could never bring himself to stop her from moaning his name as her body wiggled underneath his own, as she gasped and clawed at his back with each thrust into her.

Reaching the cashier, he set his single box of q-tips on the counter, refusing to meat Sasame's eyes. He secretly suspected Sasame was smirking at him, but did not want to bring the subject up.

"Are you Hayate?" The clerk asked, putting his q-tips in a bag and setting them on the counter.

"What if I am?" He asked, now confused at how she knew his name.

"Your girlfriend called," she said, and Hayate was suddenly aware of her eyes roaming his body. "Might I add, her description of you was quit right."

"Is there a point to this?" He asked, shuffling uncomfortably under her intense gaze.

"Yes," The woman said, looking back up to his eyes. "She asked if I could remind you that she likes banana flavor. She said she knew you would forget what kind was her favorite."

Hayate was now certain his entire body was bright red. No way was hegoing to go back and buy them now. Not with her knowing. And this time he was certain Sasame let out a laugh behind him.

"Banana flavored what, Hayate?" Sasame asked, not even trying to mask his obvious amusement with the whole situation.

"Ice cream," Hayate shot out, not knowing what else to say. "I keep trying to tell her it is vile and I will not waste my money on it." What he and Himeno decided to do in their, in his, bedroom was of no one else's concern.

Paying for his unneeded purchase, Hayate quickly left the store, not wanting to ever see Sasame again. His wish was unmet, though.

"Hey, Hayate, didn't you forget something?" He heard the knight of sound ask, and turning around, he wanted nothing more than to just melt into the ground and never see daylight, or the other knights, again.

Storming over to his friend, he grabbed the box of banana flavored condoms and quickly vanished, vowing to kill Himeno as well.

"She sent me to remind you!" Sasame yelled after the vanished Hayate, knowing full well that he could not hear him. Talking more to himself, he added as an afterthought "I tried to tell her that kiwi strawberry is better. Oh well." With that, he vanished, swearing to himself that he would never let Hayate forget this.

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Ok, I hope you enjoyed. My first published fic with any sexual nature, not that Im prude or anything. I just thought this would be funny. I know I'm probably going to get a lot of hate mail about how short this one is, but oh well. I didn't want to figure out a whole long plot line for this one little idea. So, I hope you enjoyed, and I hope you will go check out my other Pretear fics as well! Please review, I love feedback!


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